TDX









Fri Jan 20

Translating NYC text messaging.

My sister is an actor.

She recently moved from Los Angeles to NYC.

I recently moved from NYC, but that was after a decade of residing in the concrete jungle.  

I feel like I should help her.  Well, maybe just with the nuances only New Yorkers can appreciate.  Like, for example, text messaging.  Residents of Gotham interpret texting differently than others.  A few illustrations;

  • Text Message:  in a cab
  • Translation: I’m outside.  I’m looking for a cab and feel confident that I’ll snag one in less than 5 minutes.
  • Text Message:  leaving in 5
  • Translation:  leaving in 15 minutes
  • Text Message:  b there in 5
  • Translation:  I’m 15 minutes away
  • Text Message:  where is it?
  • Translation:  If the restaurant/bar/club/lounge you’re suggesting is above 14th street, there’s a strong possibility I will not attend
  • Text Message:  I’m going to a birthday party.  After?
  • Translation:  we will not see each other tonight
  • Text Message:  dining in
  • Translation:  I ordered from seamlessweb
  • Text Message: Where do I get the J?
  • Translation:  I don’t leave Manhattan.  Ever.
  • Text Message:  What r u doing after Macy’s?
  • Translation:  I would not go to Herald’s Square unless my entire family was being held at gun point.
  • Text Message:  call me when get in 
  • Translation:  we’ll do something another day

Good luck, sis!

-The David Xperience

Tue Oct 4
“ Sometimes, when life gets really tough and you start to question whether all your hard work will pay off, at that moment, consider just how much happier you’d be if having a porn career wasn’t so taboo. The David Xperience
Mon Sep 19

College sports collapse…

I have read it countless time.  You may have too.  It is communicated in a variety of ways, but the message boils down to this; when you’re on top and your actions lead you to believe you’re invincible, that’s when you should start to worry.  

Unfortunately, university presidents and athletic directors evidently don’t do much reading, or thinking, for that matter as evidenced by the extensive realignment occurring in haste.  

The damage will be great.  It already is.

Over the weekend, Syracuse University and the University of Pittsburgh jettisoned the Big East Conference.  After decades of rivalries cultivated among generations of students, those suddenly vanish as university presidents initiate shotgun marriages with conferences full of strangers.  That’s what isn’t understood in college sports nowadays; that the rivalries built over decades have led us to where we are in collegiate athletics.  

The rivalries meant something because teams shared a conference where the outcome of such contests had implications far greater than just a ‘friendly’ as they say in soccer parlance.  Now, Syracuse-Georgetown, or Pitt-UConn, has little-to-no ramifications in the college basketball.  And football? Forget it.  

The system has bent over and over and over, and now, it’s breaking.  Shattering is a more apropos word.  Contests that people - particularly students and alumni - will soon cease to exist due to “scheduling conflicts”.  Will Texas A&M alumni now get all jazzed up to play Vanderbilt on a random Saturday in the Fall?  Or LSU?  Or Auburn?  I doubt it.

The beauty of what transpired over the past few decades - mainly my entire lifetime - is that rivalries among colleges were cultivated, thanks to an explosion in media coverage and generations grew up knowing who to love, who to hate, and why.  Now, that’s gone.

Change is good, but only when the fundamentals behind change are solid.  One must analyze the ramifications of change before undergoing it.  To the detriment of students, athletes, alumni, and fans, the changes altering the landscape of collegiate athletics are not grounded in any objective reasoning.  

Instead, it’s being billed as a money grab.  Only problem is, universities are counting on the money to be there.  What happens if it isn’t?  When Texas A&M can’t field a competitive football team because in-state recruits don’t find it glamorous to get their butts kicked every week by Alabama, LSU, Auburn,  and Florida, and the fans don’t rally around their wounded program, and national broadcasters no longer find it profitable to show the TAMU vs. Vanderbilt game…then what?

Thu Aug 25
“ …Again and again, Mr. Jobs has gambled that he knew what the customer would want, and again and again he has been right. The New York Times
Tue Aug 23
On CNBC...

The Decathlon makes its debut on CNBC.  Boom!

Thu May 5
my little blog: Misfortune Cookies

kaylaisms:

The other night’s circumstances required late night chinese delivery. This led to the inevitable end of meal “fortune” cookie. I broke into it, ready to believe whatever the little white strip of paper would tell me. I read it. Frowned. It was an advertisement for American Airlines. “What the…

Sun Feb 20
The Inherent Impossibility of the Wingman A good friend is always ready and willing to be a wingman.  The guy who struts into a bar, lounge, or club, surveys the selection and pounces on the prey most likely to enjoy the company of his single buddy.  Inherently, the wingman is almost always as a disadvantage.  Reason being, the wingman has nothing to lose.  Often, the wingman already has a steady girlfriend, or wife, so he has the confidence necessary to attract and retain the attention of a female.  The eligible bachelor likely lacks the ‘game’ infecting his wingman, thus, the bachelor is less engaging than the wingman.  It just happens.  And no matter the lengths the wingman goes to encourage the bachelor to play up his assets, make the women giggle, and pique the opposite sex’s interest, the wingman is doomed to fail because the bachelor thinkshe has something to lose.  In reality, he doesn’t.  Okay, maybe a little pride, but that’s so relative.  Alas, I will continue to work on my wingman etiquette and improve my performance to the benefit of my single buddies. -The David Xperience

The Inherent Impossibility of the Wingman

A good friend is always ready and willing to be a wingman.  The guy who struts into a bar, lounge, or club, surveys the selection and pounces on the prey most likely to enjoy the company of his single buddy.  Inherently, the wingman is almost always as a disadvantage.  Reason being, the wingman has nothing to lose.  Often, the wingman already has a steady girlfriend, or wife, so he has the confidence necessary to attract and retain the attention of a female.  The eligible bachelor likely lacks the ‘game’ infecting his wingman, thus, the bachelor is less engaging than the wingman.  It just happens.  And no matter the lengths the wingman goes to encourage the bachelor to play up his assets, make the women giggle, and pique the opposite sex’s interest, the wingman is doomed to fail because the bachelor thinkshe has something to lose.  In reality, he doesn’t.  Okay, maybe a little pride, but that’s so relative.  Alas, I will continue to work on my wingman etiquette and improve my performance to the benefit of my single buddies.

-The David Xperience

The World’s Worst Gambler I don’t gamble.  Well, not in the traditional sense.  In life, yes, I like to take risks.  Professionally, I build companies with bold, broad initiatives.  Gambling, however, is something I don’t do.  I don’t have the stomach to lose money.  Any money.  However, I broke from character back in January and bet on college football’s national championship game because my alma mater was playing in it (and won).  So I gambled and won.  Not much, but I won.  I took 90% of my winnings and swept them right into a bank account.  The remaining 10% would be ‘play money’.  So, I bet Wisconsin would beat then-undefeated Ohio State University in basketball last weekend.  I won.  The, I bet a parlay this weekend.  Not knowing the nuances behind gambling on multiple games, I chose 3 games, picked the winner of each game and took the point spread into consideration.  By the end of the 1st game, I thought I lost which would mean the outcome of the next 2 games is meaningless.  I was wrong.  Today, I checked my account and discovered I had won.  After a day of feeling sorry for losing a paltry sum, I’m now reinvigorated.  I won.  If only I knew this yesterday.  Details. -TDX

The World’s Worst Gambler

I don’t gamble.  Well, not in the traditional sense.  In life, yes, I like to take risks.  Professionally, I build companies with bold, broad initiatives.  Gambling, however, is something I don’t do.  I don’t have the stomach to lose money.  Any money.  However, I broke from character back in January and bet on college football’s national championship game because my alma mater was playing in it (and won).  So I gambled and won.  Not much, but I won.  I took 90% of my winnings and swept them right into a bank account.  The remaining 10% would be ‘play money’.  So, I bet Wisconsin would beat then-undefeated Ohio State University in basketball last weekend.  I won.  The, I bet a parlay this weekend.  Not knowing the nuances behind gambling on multiple games, I chose 3 games, picked the winner of each game and took the point spread into consideration.  By the end of the 1st game, I thought I lost which would mean the outcome of the next 2 games is meaningless.  I was wrong.  Today, I checked my account and discovered I had won.  After a day of feeling sorry for losing a paltry sum, I’m now reinvigorated.  I won.  If only I knew this yesterday.  Details.

-TDX

Sat Jan 29

Credit card companies - why?

Why do credit card companies send offers, yet require people to apply?  That seems like a waste of money.  I mean, if I were in charge of, say, VISA I’d be sure we only solicited people who we knew were worthy of the cards being offered.  Otherwise, we’re just sending mail to people we don’t want as customers.  And why the fuck would you do that?

-TDX

Sun Dec 19

Greeting Cards - son to mother

Why is it that the folks at Hallmark always assume that sons treat their mothers like shit?  Every card is always like, “I know it seems like I don’t appreciate you”, or “Since I never tell you I love you”.  I mean, what the hell?  I know for a fact I’m not the only guy who treats his mother with respect and is courteous.  C’mon, I’ve puke on my mother more times than I care to admit and yet she still loves me; why wouldn’t I love her back?  Maybe next year Hallmark will concoct a card for a son who isn’t a delinquent, crack-smoking, unemployed, burn out. 

-TDX